I take Jack to school most days. It’s just kindergarten, but we live in the era of competitive eduction, so class starts at 8am (and goes until 2pm).
Jack loves his teachers and doesn’t mind going to school, but it’s never easy getting out the door. He’s only been to the office once for a tardy slip, but he and I dance on the gray line of “on time.” More specifically, we arrive everyday between 7:59 and 8:01am.
Seriously. It’s like clockwork. We pull up right before or right after the bell. I leave the car running and escort him halfway to his line-up before kissing him and telling him to have a great day. He speed-walks to the back of the line—always one of the last three kids… but not “late.”
Why? Why don’t we get there two or three minutes earlier?
Most mornings I think to myself, “we’ll leave a couple minutes earlier today.” But we don’t. We don’t, but we want to—or, I want to.
Jack doesn’t know what time it is. He’s basing this whole experience on what he hears from me and the urgency he sees in me.
In other words, we arrive when we arrive because of my systems. My mental, emotional, physical systems are perfectly engineered to arrive at Jack’s school one minute before or after 8am. Urgency kicks in at a certain time because of subconscious beliefs I have about how much I’m willing to rush, how fast I can get there, the sacrifice of time I’m willing to make, or how long I think Jack should be standing outside in a line. I don’t think this consciously everyday, but there’s a system working below the surface. And if our arrival time is going to change, I’m going to have to change the system.
And so are you.
What do you believe about the situation?
How do you think about it when you’re not thinking (subconsciously)?
What does it mean?
What’s your rationale?
How badly do you really want to change?
What’s the new system and when does it start?